New

I need newness. A new haircut. A new mouse. A new moleskine. New pens. New inspirations to work on. New concepts. New closet style. New friends to care for. New strangers to talk to. New books. New words. New songs. New bands. New guitar picks. New chords. New idiot-proof food recipes. New stock-ups for the fridge. New ways of stress relief. Again, a new haircut, because I've been pulling my hair out.

& most of all, a new routine.

Recap: November

Know how they always have recaps at the end of the show? Well here's one of (almost) the entire month:

Lunchbox Wednesdays with the gang in an effort to save money + eat clean (it only lasted two weeks lol) 

Mom's birthday a week ago, ft. 12" mango swiss roll 

Morning musings a.k.a. Doing things I love than things I should be doing

Sundate with @ohdearnicole, ft. the puny portion of lasagna from The Providore. 

Also, we watched Ender's Game (because it was the only other show available) but there were no regrets.

On Monday, it was just me and Tia the entire day. We played pretend and we had "apples" and "water" for dinner thrice that evening. We also had a pet dragon named Draggy and we cleaned up its poo. I've been juggling work and school in case anyone's wondering, merely because I love my job.

Right now, these moments with family and friends (and the kids at the centre) are so rare. In other words, school has taken over my life and TGIF.

From the bed

21 Nov - It's been fourteen months.

You're not with me anymore, but still, you are near wherever I go. Sometimes you're at the corridor of the classroom, sometimes you're just an arm's length away where I'll watch you subtly jamming to the music and doing your thing. Sometimes you don't notice me, sometimes you do and walk the other way. I know.

Today reminded me of yesteryear, when we would step into school in similar outfits, except we used to argue over who copied who. Now, there's no big deal in that anymore. I can't decide if waking up (in the bus) to seeing you was a pleasant surprise or an awkward shock of my life. I can't decide if pretending not to realise and walking away was exactly the right move.

I can't decide.

North/north

I think the word that best describes this phase of my life right now would be: Repulsive

Repulsive to school (this applies to every part of my life but still), repulsive to friends, repulsive to going out, repulsive to food, repulsive to... boys, and basically, repulsive to everything I like / should like.

Maybe it's the flu.